Saturday, July 12, 2008

I screwed up

Nothing big, but not small either. Just some stuff, but some stuff that makes a difference, some stuff that adds up.
Frustration
Frustration and disappointment.
with myself
2 weeks
about two weeks of frustration
i did it to myself
It's amazing the difference it makes, the difference GOD makes.
I was growing. I was seeing him. I was loving.
I left the trail, jumped headfirst into the thorns by the wayside.
Why?
I wanted to
Why?
sounds stupid really
it is stupid
I (fully aware of the sin, and of its consequences) left the path which felt so right to wander blindly through the same thorny thicket I've seen a thousand times.
I've been resolutely ignoring the signs pointing back to the Way. It's been long enough.
It's tough to get back to the Way. It starts slow. The choice to read, to listen to God when I just don't feel like listening. But I'm coming back, and GOD of course is there to pull me up.
It's obvious really.
Life sucks without GOD.
maybe i'll remember that this time

2 comments:

J-Ra said...

Hey! We should chat.

Mark Buss said...

I'm a little late on the commenting but I really enjoyed reading this. It agrees with what I've done so many times and have regretted everytime.